Helen ~ Heynen

I need to get these workouts typed out before I forget….they all sort of mesh together after a few days and I have been dyin to get in here and get it all down....but mostly because I am an impatient brat!!

Yesterday was Plyometrics!

Today, I had that “treadles” cranked up max speed on the HIIT! That’s right….I am that awesome!

Arms and Shoulders blasted -- for some reason I was really looking forward to that one!....tommorow is Yoga....I do this in the dark.....I am all about workouts in the dark!

So today it was death to Hershey....I have come to the conclusion that Hershey is out to destroy me and everything I stand for.......there was a bag of Hershey's hugs in in the staff fridge. They are always there and throwing themselves at me and calling my name and trying to jump in my mouth.....it just isn't right! I mean they try to make the cheat harder and all when you have to take off all that menacing foil, but they make it easy with their cute little stripes, pointy tops and cute little pull top paper thingie...... and it kinda reminded me of a fortune cookie, except there’s no fortune…it just says "Hershey Hershey Hershey" written all over it......trying to brain wash the world!

So Kudos to you, Hershey for signing me up today for the Hershey sucker club!

So I broke my shower the other day too…handle came off in my hand. Could it be all this working out is working it’s magic….or is someone sneaking into my home at night loosening all my sh*t up????
Daaaaaamn. I must say I’m becoming quite the handy woman, though. You should of seen the plumbing problem I fixed this summer…granted, it was after I created it. I handled that like a champ. But lemme tell ya …….I have a lot of muscle goin on right now.... enough muscle for this ole girl!!......

I went to the gym closer to me then the one I was going to a few weeks back. Good choice. I could always join Good life literally 2 blocks down the street from me, but I have a few other gyms that I am checkin out right now, so I'll just continue to do my part contributing to global warming by driving 1/2 way across town.

My plan is to get a new bike for the spring. I am hoping that my friend agrees to custom build one for me....I saw one that he had built back awhile ago and just fell it love with it. He was raffeling it off for a turbo kick event that he held. I think it was the onr time in a long while that I clenched my fists together, looked up to the heavens and prayed..."please pick me.....please please pic me" It was actually quite pathetic and whiney...But I didn't care..... it was a dreamy bike... a white one....kinda like a "white stallion".... and I really wanted it.

Anyhoo....

I get to the gym this morning to see that there was a spinning class going on. It had only started like 10 min before so I thought I’d wander on in. The class was packed. I was gazing over the room to see if there were any empty bikes. Then all these people were like, “oh, there’s an empty bike over here! Over here!” Whoa….wait a minute. Why are these strangers being so nice to me!!? Were they trying to trick me? I’m a very suspicious person…Anyways so I proceed with caution to this area where supposedly there is this “extra bike.” I was happy at first…what a fine bike it was.

Then I go to adjust the seat. There is no stupid knob. No bloody, stupid, stinkin knob people!!! Just an ugly screw thing sticking out. This wouldn’t have been a problem if I was about 8 feet tall….it was conveniently stuck all the way up as high as it would go.

So I had another moment of rage…I threw my towel on the ground and balled up my fists….”I DON’T HAVE TO TAKE THIS FROM YOU SCRAWNY WEAKLINGS!!!!” Ok, ok…I didn't. But it was lookin like another day of 'mill for me. The good news is that the 'mills are on the outside of the cycling room, but you can still see inside the cycling room….which meant I could shoot dirty looks in there if I wanted to….

This has been the beginning of a new phase for me...New workouts...new pain.…

I like trying new stuff and setting new goals. So far so good at been keeping out outta trouble like I planned. I’m kidding.….it DOES NOT keep me out of trouble like I thought it would. haha. -- I did sleep in this morning by 2 meezly hours though which subtracts a couple hours of trouble makin. -- but every bit counts.

So I get up and to go to the market, but I think I am going to go every Sunday from now on...(which means I don't have to get up super early)....that way I can be there right when it opens so I can get farm eggs before they run out. I used to be able to have access to them anytime I wanted. That was the perk of having inlaws that owned well over 12,000 chickens! -- too bad I wasn't into healthy eating during that time....back then it was "fry them babies up"....

Anyways......they ring a bell at 10am sharp…it’s a whole production that is taken very seriously. Believe me, a few weeks ago.... I tried to do a little transaction before 10:00 and every vendor said no. This lady even told me to just take one of her flowers I wanted to buy because said she’d "get in trouble" if she accepted money before THE BELL. I told her I’d pay her for it next week, which was this morning, but she wasn’t there today! Maybe she doesn't work Saturdays...I don't know. But... now I have to walk around with this fifty cent debt hanging over my head for another week. Great.

…onto my workout:

Just Legs and Back yesterday, HIIT for a long 30 minutes...it kicks my A$$ everytime! and KenpoX today. I've been thinking about an energy boost suppliement again and keep going back and forth about it. I don’t know if I should. I have to make a call to my psychic advisor first…she assists in making all major/life decisions that I come across….you think that I ordered that fake ponytail hair piece online this morning just because I felt like it? ...... Ooooh, no…she told me to. Man, she’s bossy!

I came across this strange thing yesterday. It’s a website — www.myphonefood.com Whoooa….weird. Has anyone heard of this? From what I gather, you take a cell phone picture of whatever you are about to eat and then send it to this site from your phone. It keeps track of everything in a “journal” with pics of the food…..what???? Ok, I didn’t get too far into it….I really don’t have time to keep up with it….but it seems interesting. Yeah…and I guess you can even pay to have some “dietician” look at the pics (I guess) and analyze everything. I don’t know…and no…I am not making this up! I will read up on it later and report any findings…after consulting with my advisor, of course. She would KILL me if she knew I consulted with a dietician….and I don’t need all that drama.

So, I took a pic of my protein pancake this morning…which, somehow manifested itself into Pac-Man. It’s really kinda freaky….I think it’s a sign…gotta call the advisor for the true meaning behind this one. I’ll send it to myfoodphone anyways….see what they have to say about this…
Pac-Man was about to throw down with Aunt Jamima….and we all know he ain’t got a chance in hell….however, it was LITE Aunt J..…which could mean he would come out on top this time. Don’t worry, I broke it up before things got outta hand….I ate the both of em…they can continue their nonsense in my tummy. Suckas

I can barely walk today. I have just been sort of rolling around to and fro.…things got ugly from there. Soooo, what did I do today? Oh, I thought it would be a good idea to do HIIT today backwards....... Ummmm, no. It was not a good idea at all. Therefore, today I roll.

Hams and glutes were so so sore, barely passed the toilet test! I tried to ignore it, pretend it wasn’t really true. “Oh, now Helen…you are just imagining things again.” So basically, I am thinking my next leg workout will be cut short on account of me dying. I may just hold on on them for a bit till they recover fully! Why oh why do I do this to myself....well...that is like....why do I lie?.....cause it's fun! *wink*

But luckily, somehow, today I am alive and well despite my odd disposition and the fact that I had to park a mile away from everything...professionals keep saying it is better for me...….I won’t question it–I just roll widit (see above)…I think this could be a tangent universe I’m in here…I’ll know more later..... But I am seriously questioning that at this moment.

Just thinking about when I should post some progress pics....But maybe I’ll just save those til the end of this round —I’m soo looking forward to it!<–sarcasm. *fingers crossed* Just thinking about it is a migraine starter right now! Besides...like I have any time in the daylight to take them anyhow (shrugs shoulders)........I'm to busy....it never ends....and then when I do get a minute.....I am like - dead. Doesn't make for a happy picture taking moment if you ask me and besides....on a more positive note, by the time I actually find the time to take them....I am gonna be so bad to the bone I won't be recognizable!

Yea....I think I'll wait!

Did Back and Bi's tonight....lucky for me I have that pain to look forward to tommorow. I am sure Yoga will remind me of it just incase I forget!

I've had lots of food moments....gonna catch up on another day.....

I just had the a most excellent PLYOMETRICS workout tonight, and a not-too-shabby workout yesterday, too!! How do I do it!! I don’t know…I usually get home, change, but then blackout on my way out to the livingroom….but I assume that I had an awesome workout!! I am sure I did!! Really, I think I am just gonna get the video out so I can review it later and see what I did. BTW...... I'm not sure if I have tight squeeze on the squats...but Sweet if I do!!!!!….I’ll have to check that out now.

Last night was the first time doing Chest, Shoulders and Triceps OoooOooh yes...it was. I only got through the last three moves, thanks to my “go-to, please-don’t-let-me-die-doing-pushups today, kick aSS song” courtesy of Metallica! I really started getting sore/tight last night and I couldn’t wait to wake up today to feel the extent of my pain this morning. I have even been gettin in some good, steady cardio aside from running my mouth in a few days, and that’s all I care about. I’m so selfish like that!!

I wish I could bottle this soreness up right now and eat it everyday for breakfast!! That’s how much I love it!! -- Well that and my Orange drinky drink!

Tonight I went for a walk in the rain on my dinner break, I even tried to be extra dramatic about it when I got back to work, you know...showing off my wet head for added effect just to see if anyone would do anything (pat my head, say how awesome I am….something! I got nothing…)......Whatever.

Then I get home and get I got all jacked up over YOGA.

But first I must x'plain why:

I just keep pluggin along, gonna try to keep my hussy bootie out of trouble...and on track! I only have 10 more weeks to go before my trip and that is a whole lotta hussy bootie lickin in a short period of time! I have placed that on the top (okay near the top) of my sh*t list!!! I've asked the fat to leave nicely and it still won't leave so I must get aggressive now as I look back in those good old days, when I was full off sass, in shape and looked cool in camo!

Like last week, for example, my veins were popping out like crazy when I did arms and shoulders, but the ones in my upper arms are still being a little shy to make a full blown appearance and it is annoying! Stupid Fat! ...I HATE YOU! Just come off the right spots will ya??? Just please spare the chest region! I need to keep that area in tact like you don't even know!

"Hey Helen, who ya talkin to?"

"Huh? Oh....just my fat...just my fat....."

Figured I better get in here and talk about what I did yesterday before I forget what I did, which is partly what happened already!

Yesterday was a busy day!!! Got lots of movement, with all the chores I had scheduled for myself!!!!..so I couldn't do my usual 1/2 day workouts. Basically, I just jumped around and did excersises as I walked around!

I did get my hair done and my eyebrows done, so that counts for an isometric full body workout as I stated in horrible pain it caused as I sat in that torture chair, with every muscle flexed, so I will consider that the equivalent of lower weight/higher reps, or the endurance type activity.
Plus, I cried again....just for the extra drama and added calorie burn!!!

Okay...so I didn't Wowy it but I am counting it as a strenuous workout. Basically, I have been so super busy that I didn't have a structured workout!

I did, however, manage to to clean around my treadmill, it must of had about a hundy gigantic dust bunnies all over it. But thank goodness, because now I know where all the dust bunnies live....they probably have some pimped out bunny pad set up there underneath, so I had to put them out of business....I will not be having none of that in my place, but don't you all worry about what kind of business I run in this place -- I have it all under control!

Got my new P90X bars the other day, YUMMY!!!....and again (see above) since I was too busy, I actually did not cook anything so I had one....


Am I the only one who keeps holding out for the golden ticket in their protien bar wrapper???

Anyways....I think I wasted my protien for the day, I am such a wHiMp!

But don't you worry about today -- I plan to backout! watch out! I am back on my game, homies.

I just read about the most brillant idea....and I am all over this...

Everyday we are forced to look in the mirror, well some days. Some days I just don't want to look cause it is scary....and I think my big bro can attest!

I am going to try this.

I am going to take a dry erase marker and write a little motivational note to myself....

I have to see it every time I look in the mirror...it shows a symbolic connection between perceived, visialized and realistic self You wake up in the morning feeling a certain way...perhaps you convince yourself of all the reasons why you can't....and then well...you have to look in the mirror and face your temple...

Your body is your temple.....your activity is your foundation....

Lately, I have been walking about in my non-virtual life, I have been finding myself telling more everyone I come into contact this.. I believe in it…wholeheartedly, that transformation does not just happen on the outside…that in order for them to stick - in a healthy way - they must encompass more than the part of us that feeds the "I want to fit in my jeans" or "I want to look better" desire…. ultimately FEELING better and being a MORE COMPLETE person is what will have a lasting effect on our lives….don’t cha think???

It has been 4 years now, since I found a lifestyle of fitness and making better eating choices. And through this journey I have come to realize that this is not just about obsessing over my food choices, or pushing myself through my weights, or even burning more calories as I do my cardio…. No, this is about taking this lifestyle and attempting a precarious balancing act with all other areas of your life… family, faith, friends, work, laundry, home maintenance….THIS is where things I find things to so easily get out of alignment.

Yes, choices….this is about making the right ones. And more importantly as I find my way through all of this, I find I need to pick options for myself that are MAINTAINABLE so no other area of my life suffers….. Why am I writing all of this??

I am glad you asked!!

Because we make choices for ourselves that will bring us to some level of meeting our own personal hierarchy of needs!....I know this may sound a little Maslowish...but it is true! First you need to define what level you want to be at. I know some people have admitted that they just want to lose a few lbs and feel a little lighter....which is great!!!...(and I say this with my tongue in cheek) because mostly those will eventually feel the benefits of their changes they make and strive to continue with it....ahhhhhh do you see the irony????

Other's on the other hand, are Diehards....they climb the mountain every single day, they know their bodies well and they strive to challenge it every single chance they get. Not only for the physical benefits, but also for that inner sense of self, of belonging, of achievement, self-actulization and balance. They see that all this "stuff" feeds into other aspects of their lives and it is a good feeling of fulfillment.

So....first you need to identify: where are you? where do you want to be? how far are you willing to climb? and where do you find yourself feeling satisfied!

Grab your rope! Happy Climbing!

I’ve had some rather rushed workouts lately (yesterday and today) and I don’t like it one bit!! I’m gonna log them here before I forget.....

Yesterday -- Frik...can't remember!

Have you ever driven from one place to the next and the who drive was a blur...that's it.

Hold on....I did Legs and Back....and 2o min on the EFX.

I believe I did some ARX in front of all the Gym freaks... but I’m not really counting this b/c it was more to show off than anything.

But today....oh today....let me tell ya.....

Many people know I don’t like close talkers unless they smell quite nice and are easy on the eyes…..And I definitely DO NOT like speed walkers that tailgate you while you are minding your own business walking. For crying out loud, people, walk around!!! Pass me on the right, the left, jump over me, I don’t really care. Just don’t trail behind me about 2 inches away from my heels and huff and puff and sigh….I am a looking around people -- get over your walk rage!!!!....because belive me......I know you are there alright…..that is mostly the reason for my walking so slow, stutter stepping, jab stepping, stop-n-go and no use of turn signals….GET A CLUE and STAY OUT OF MY BUBBLE!

Note: she DID NOT smell quite nice…..it would have been a different story then.

Yeah, so this this lady was following very closely behind me. Was she trying to hide from someone? I don’t know. Maybe. There were about 100 open lockers…she picked one about 2 lockers away from the one I went to. Nice. Oh, what is this? She started throwing clothes everywhere and obviously was in a VERY big hurry. I thought of this as more of a competition. I was determined to get undressed/dressed and out of that locker room faster than her. I think she knew it, too. Shoes off! Towels out! Pepper spray out! Throw bag in! Done!!! "Woo Hoo! Yes! IN YOUR FACE, close walker!!!" If she didn’t know it was a locker room changing competition before, she did after I yelled that and threw my hands up in tha air. I was just trying to show her that you can, indeed, get changed quick and not walk QUITE so closely to people, mainly me!

So I do my 30 min swim session and a kick boxing class as planned. It is ridiculous how on top of things I am!!. and at 5 am this morning (making apocolyic history) This only requiring 2 involuntary stops at Tim Hortons between my apt and the gym and then from the gym back to my apt.

But after my workout......I went to kill some time in the steam room. I poked around with that baby for awhile. After pushing several buttons.....It said I had to wait 4 min or so for the the stream to run through...yea right! I sat in there like a foo for much longer patiently waiting...and waiting...and waiting....NADA! (probably busted the sucker). So then I walk across to the sauna and seen that it was empty so I went in. You just can’t pass on an opportunity like that so I had a nice stretching session for about 10 minutes or so -- Then the freaks started coming in. Stretching session over, but.......OH, I’m sure people saw it…..at least I didn't leave any sweat butt marks behind!

So as I am walking out of the sauna room....here was a girl there who had a full face of makeup on coming in talking all about her 3 Yoga sessions a week...yada yadda yadda.... I’m not kidding, like everything…foundation, powder, mascara, she had her hair done and I’m sweating my butt off!

I don’t understand how people do that. How can you stand it? I already had my towel that I was carrying around, but I wanted to go up to her and ask if I could have hers since she didn’t need it. Can anybody figure that out? Is there something I don’t know. I mean, even if the makeup was all waterproof, sweatproof, bullet proof, whatever….why would you want it caked on your face when you workout? Anybody….? Excuse me now, I’m gonna g paint my walls and spray them with a hose!!!!!!!

So then later in the day, I head to sportscheck, and notice how those brainiacs that strategically place all that cool last minute stuff right by the checkouts!! They work it from a million different angles. First of all , you are feeling all warm n fuzzy cause you got someone in front of you, someone behind you, maybe you’re even getting a piggy-back ride standing to here–you are basically in the middle of group of total strangers, but you can’t help but feel kinda like a family. Well, at least teamates for a few minutes. Standing there, you all have the same goal in mind which is to get your stuff and get the heck outta there!!! I don’t know all the convoluted logistics of it all, but I know they are totally playing on our emotions. Any sports store....I’m instantly attracted by default and those places really know how how to blast some good tunes through the joint….another tactic by the “higher ups” as well, I’m sure. I fall for it every single time.

Why?…..WHY? …..trickery, friends…strategic checkout line trick trick trickery

Other needless items I picked up: New "Nike" socks! 2-in-1 body wash/shave stuff which I’m sure is really a lie, some shiny spray hair stuff... 8million yards of dental floss….oh, and a giant spoon. A GIANT SPOON!!! I really needed one….

Today goes down in history as one of the best freaking workouts ever. When I’m done here I will be logging it in the book I’m writing, Helen's Freaking Best Ever Of 2008.

While I’m on the subject......yesterday....I had the best freaking nap ever -- all the variables were perfect, it started with calling in sick as my ears were on fire...totally plugged with water which was causing some discomfort and pain..... my guess from the aggression from my swimming the other day. Either way, I logged it accordingly ;)

The plan today was to do some cardio, but then I worked the legs with some PLYOMETRICS. Yes, that’s right ….I did monster cardio THEN monster legs. why? cause....I’m a straight up monster flippin machine.....and it don’t stop…

I did 30 min of HIIT on the elliptical. The cleaning lady stopped by a few times to mop up sweat, bring me water and do whatever the hell else I told her to (monsters have this kind of authority). ...I think my ears were leaking at this point....maybe sweat?...I really don't want to know, but my ears are not plugged anymore! Some people would have gotten drugs to deal with this issue, but not me, no siree....I just jump up and down like a mad woman and voila! -- fixed!

I brought 2 towels to my workout….one for wiping sweat and the other to serve as a barrier between my butt and whatever germ-ridden gym machine I’m on. So, then I got off the elliptical and took the elevator downstairs to the locker room. You think I’m kidding. Ok, I am…I slid down the railing like always. (just kidding again...I don't even think they even have an elevator) Anyways......I had some recovery formula in my handy dandy water bottle, and when I went pull the top out ***PoOF*** it had a little explosion and some catapulted out and onto the wall! I wanted to use my butt towel to hide behind, but instead...I wiped down the wall with my butt blocking towel…..lol….actually, no I didn’t -- you know what I did???.....I got my cleaning lady to do it for me (see monster reference above).

Then I had someone ask me "What are you drinking!!??" I explained the P90X recovery formula in all it's delish glory and that all us X'ers are doing it these days -- cause that is what we do. but...I wasn't about to share. Germs eh?

Sooo all in all, I had CrAzY energy today. I can’t remember the last time I had energy like that....okay yes I do but don't want to talk about it here...Oh, man that time was fun.....

Anyhow....I also tried some squats with barbells and lunges....and then I laid on a bench and bowed my legs up over and over (I'm sure there is a name for that move, but it was just a move I saw on utube and using my coffeetable wasn't appropriate from what I saw) Basically, I had my butt screaming bloody murder at me today!

This was a fly by the seat workout...pretty much like everything else in my life....but either way it was super awesome-tastic!

…dodging bullets and drinking lotsa coffee these days....been hectic busy! I found some Yerba Mate Tea today, so I am hoping to cut back on some of the Caffeine intake and keep it down to 2 cups a day!

Lucky for me....with all sorts of stuff going on......I've still been making time to workout. Thank Gd!!! Cuz the bullets seem to be coming faster and faster these days. I’m sure it’s not me….
Let’s see…I did swimming yesterday with Larissa, and she is like a freakin torpedo in the water I tell ya....keeping up to her was insane! I was a little crybaby with my cramped foot....and I was more than willing to tell anyone who would listen -- no one really cared. I hate little foot cramps....I would rather just die! How annoying! Then I got gas...again...no one was interested in hearing about it.