Helen ~ Heynen

…I still just don’t even know anymore.

This week so far as been freakishly strange. The other day about 3/4 into my Arms and Shoulder's routine I felt queasy and faint....I never get sick….so I thought I'd blame this on stress/lack of sleep/working out like a mad woman after not doing much of anything for the last 2 weeks. I stopped to break and crashed on the couch for the remainder of my workout. I could hear the the workout still going on in the background....so in my head I was at least visualizing me doing the moves yet I laid there comatose! -- seemed it was a 24 hour bug that got the best of me....nothing a few doses of Tylonal couldn't handle though....

Yesterday I was able to do some cardiOOO….intervals (near death)....and today I signed up at the GYM!

I am pleased to report that this Mexican dude told me I workout really hard. Although I coulda broke this little guy in two (little on the petite side)…I’m pretty sure he was in a gang, which technically reconfirmed that I am, in fact, bad to the bone. Which gang?, I don’t know, but he had one pant leg up and some scars that looked like they could pass for old knife wounds that healed without the use of Polysporin. I coulda just told him about Vitamin E….but who am I kidding?…I was scared!–I didn’t even look him in the eye. “Just look down…"thanks" and look down….”

This morning I faced that evil StairMaster, after I got a little courage ( I don’t know…) I don’t like to look that damn StairMaster in the eye either, and there are only 3 of them at this other gym I went to this morning….phasing them out? Dunno. The chains probably rust out and fall apart from all the buckets of sweat that fall of of the people who dare to climb up on those deceiving, innocent and awkward looking dang thangs….they are closely related to the Versa Climber..those deceiving bastards…always making me look bad. VC is probably the StairMaster’s grandaddy. The ellipticals kinda suck….they are like the inbred spawn of the two…..Yea....having illegitimate relationships and having babies that look like the elliptical. Someone call Morey Povich!

So I think I can chalk today up as a kick ass day! I’m just mad cause the StairMaster got the besta me this morning. Probably because I am not used to it is all. I’m just not my usual graceful self when we get together….

But at least I got to workout like a freak today…sweating heavily…gaining respect of gangstas…and I am alright now cause I got to do my usual L/B workout at home in shorts so that no one could see my underwear!

Today was eventful....finally got my stitches out of my eye. This time I must confess that my tough girl attitude decided to take a hike today cause I cried like a little cry baby. Miss eye doctor lady had to stop a few times as I was just slightly anxious and a little overwhelmed this time around being robbed of the drugs that I was given so freely before. Apparently she believed that eye drops that freeze your eye would be enough. Oh NO....I felt it baby -- boy did I feel it, and it didn't even matter that she had Josh Groban playing in the background....I shook..like a scurdy cat! But needlesstosay...the whole ordeal is over and she warned me I will bruise again and then should be healed completely in 2 weeks.

But the he worst part of my hospital outing today was this older gentleman who was sitting in the outpatient lounge with me who appeared to be straining with his breathing. At first I wondered if he was there for eyeball poking as well, but really I just prayed that he wouldn’t pass out or have a heart attack or something cause then I would feel obligated to bust out my CPR skills and I wasn't up fer it. Screw that good samaritan nonsense–if Old guy goes down, I’m bouncin’......I didn’t see nuttin!!!!!! So wrong. I disappoint myself.

In sum, over the last few weeks, on a scale of 1-10, I had an absolute level 5 disaster and nightmare scenario that no one would ever want to deal with. Yes, the kind that ends in the reading of a will. It's impossible to even think about eating clean and counting macros in that scenario. So, I've lost 2 weeks of data collection and a lot of bio-dna activity.

14 days of sick persons comfort fuel and couch X will have its effects. We'll get some real data next week now that I'm back to the regularly scheduled program. I'll also be updating an exciting new stats next week: eggs and tuna consumed in a day!

Today -- I totally stepped out of the box...well not really, but with all the time on my hands I thought I would do a little discovering and research. Now, I normally don't eat frozen dinners unless I am in hurry or my other options available are crap....

But I read an article in the paper yesterday about how frozen dinners do their consumers wrong by not matching up what appears to be on the cover of the box thus not giving a true and honest representation of what is really in the box, kinda like in real life....but anyways.....I really think is wrong. I believe it is not OK for companies to package their products in depictions that clearly do not represent the contents. So I thought I would take matters into my own hands and do a little investigating for myself.

Let me illustrate my findings if you will:

Conclusion:

As you can see, the shrimp content does match the depiction, and in fact went beyond expectations, however, I do believe that this company must work on re-shooting its packaging photography to more accurately reflect what's inside as mine clearly does not look anything like what is on the box -- so disappointed.

Next week: Nocturnal remedies gets put to the test!

In the waiting room, I've been really working hard under pressure and pushing myself....sleeping during the day, watching movies, reading, internet,....yea...I'd say I've been pretty active. I usually switch it up though kinda like weights...you know, to avoid exhaustion and over exertion. especially on couch day! Hell-O! Sweat like crazy on couch day.
I think maybe I scare some people with how much I sweat…yeah, that’s it…. I know, I know -- cry me a river!

Plus, I think I over-slept today which is probably a good idea since after the weird things going on in my head the other day, you know about the bodybuilder (I still think that was an actual person flexing amidst the baby Jesus/other nativity characters by the church)

I have lost a bit of weight this past week, mind you not the way I would want to, but I feel great and the eye is healing up nicely – 'cept I haven’t been getting much sleep at night, despite the efforts to. This is due to my busy day schedule and other obligations and now I just like to stay up all night and disassemble my electronics and see how they work!

It was an outing day today....yes siree...took my bootie for a walk to the grocery store.

They were out of bananas -- seemed no one cared. I am up to here with the store running out of banana and plan to get to the bottom of it with head banana dude. I really need to have a chat with him.......
oh and BTW, there is no such thing as blue raspberries. I asked every local grocery store….some more than others…ok, mainly one store more than others…a lot more…so I threw a little tantrum when they told me there was no such thing and chucked some granny smith apples down the aisle –I didn’t mean to actually hit anyone, but whatever. I did. I’m banned. booooo. Anyways, turns out they really don’t exist.

Note to self: don’t ever wear the "hecho en mexico" tshirt again to the the grocery store.…this attracts too much unwanted attention…
In my defense, I only paid like 2 dollars for that badboy on my Mexican vacation last year.... ok..hey, come to think of it I have a hoodie that says "Mexico" on it. I think I’m onto something here. Do I subconsciously think I am Mexican? Do I need therapy? Is it normal to wear a sombrero to bed? Snuggle with my Patron??

Someone please call my number!!!!!

Yes, ok…I am a slacker. My worst fear came true yesterday after my run...... I died….hence no blogging....

Today was a ‘nother day…sort of blaaaah today....not feelin it.

I know the next couple of days will be a good push through and then I know that I won't be able to do much and it is makin me a little offish. I don’t like the off days …but if I have to rest then whatever..I guess I’ll do it. But needlesstosay, I pulled the poor me card and endulged in crap....

When I don't eat crap then I don't feel like I have to do "insane crazy person workouts" and can get away with just "plain crazy person workouts"


Helen, please suck less tommorow. Thanks....

Sincerely,

Me